M is for masturbation
1. How often do you masturbate? It's very irregular because it's whenever I feel like it, or the situation presents itself. I can go a week or more and be okay, then the urge will hit me suddenly out of nowhere, I get that little clit twitch, the pull in the lower belly and I need to get off RIGHT NOW. Unfortunately, due to his schedule my eldest is home every week day by 11:30ish. I have a 3 hour empty house window and I'm usually not mentally geared for self love until late afternoon when I've taken care of work and have time to relax, let my mind wander, etc... Of course I could play while he's home (and I have) but I must be really, really quiet. Therein lies the problem. Some of my toys aren't quiet and it's hard for me to be, too.
Also, my masturbation is nowhere near the levels it was a year ago. My sexuality was ramping up and I could not get enough. My libido hasn't settle, but my self control has. I learned that shared orgasms were more rewarding and ultimately what I really needed, so I saved them for my time with Od. Now those I could go for every day - but it hasn't been the case, is not the case, and doesn't look to be the case anytime soon. Pity.
Final answer : At least once a week. (May is a special occasion for me and some days I'm really pushing myself to get it done. Not the right frame of mind, I know.)
2. What are you doing to celebrate Masturbation month? Well, I'm masturbating daily. That doesn't mean I'm getting off daily, but I'm still participating. I've had some technical difficulty. I also set the challenge to Od to masturbate daily. I know he was playing along for the first 4 days. I'm not sure about now. My challemge turned into a catalyst of serious proportions, but that's another post.
3. Do you like to watch your partner masturbate?
a. Yes, it turns me on.
b. Sometimes, because it gets my partner very aroused.
c. Not really, it’s boring.
d. No, it’s a turn off.
e. I’ve never experienced it but I’d like to.
Masturbation is not something that has occurred for Od in a long time, but in the rare occasion that his hand was on his cock for anything, like switching out a ring, putting on a cage, or some other toy, I like to watch. So a.), it turns me on, but in person I have trouble not getting involved, and assisting in some way. My hands naturally gravitiate to the crotch, if only for a squeeze, pat, or quick tease. Regarding any other man whether by video gift, online porn, etc....yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I loooooooove to watch. I'm a voyeur at heart. I like to watch all kinds of things.
4. Do you let your partner watch you masturbate?
a. Yes, it turns me on to be watched.
b. Sometimes, because it gets my partner very aroused.
c. No, it’s embarrassing.
d. I’ve never experienced it but I’d like to.
I tend to feel very self-conscious if the watching is done in a hands-off way - sort of like a car up on a rack, getting serviced. Not sexy at all. I don't mind using toys, I don't mind him watching...but I need physical connection (kisses on the legs, a warm set of lips on my nipples, attention to my neck and hopefully some whispered words of encouragement. Those things make all the difference to me. If not present, then the situation falls flat - I psych myself out too much.
5. Mutual masturbation? Yea or Nay? Yea. Most definitely, enthusiastically yea. Not the side-by-side-you-do-your-thing-I'll-do-mine way, though. Too disconnected. I prefer the taking-turns-and-assisting-each-other way. Maybe that's not masturbation, maybe that's sex? I don't know. If things happen over the phone, then I can do that because of the words and the sounds in my ear. Texting or typing is difficult because I need the use of both hands, and camming is pretty much out because I need to not feel "inspected". *sigh* I'm a complicated and hard to please creature.
6. If you had an all-expense-paid trip to San Francisco to attend Masturbate-a-thon 2012 would you go and masturbate? Why or Why not? I would go, if I could simply masturbate and not stress about getting off. I'd be too busy watching everyone else. I'm assuming it's a group thing? If not, and it's more like a "go go go, it's your turn on stage" kind of thing...um, no thank you. But feel free to send me a link to any videos. (I just read the fine print and it says group environment...so sure. I'd do it with my heart in my throat, but I'd do it. With a buddy, of course.)
The Center for Sex & Culture
Sunday, May 27, 10am-midnight
Arrive by 9pm
$40 minimum self-sponsorship; or bring sponsorship form with pledges
All genders, all orientations welcome to explore self-pleasure in a supportive group environment. Check the next newsletter for more detail about this year’s Thon, and join us to Come for a Cause!
All donations and pledges support CSC’s operations and programs.Bonus: Are you addicted to masturbating? ETA : I'm not sure why my answer got deleted the first go 'round, but here's a second try : I'm not addicted to masturbation now, but in 2010 for awhile I would have answered yes. I could not get enough. As in, I would get deliciously tenderized from the lengths and amounts of self love I was administering. Then that physical reminder would set me off and I'd need to do it again. Now I would say I'm more drawn to the effects of masturbation. My body needs an orgasm every 3 days or so. I start to get hateful and generally disgruntled...so I prescribe myself therapeutic orgasms. I would have them through partnered activities, ideally, but masturbation works otherwise. Recently, it has become the norm. Even more recently I could use one every night to fall asleep, but it's tricky to pull off when someone is snoring next to you. Not impossible - but tricky.
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Happy TMI Tuesday!