Extra Stuff

Friday, February 18, 2011

Something Better

I found this photo somewhere online (a tumblr account, I think) in the last month or so and it spoke to me. I've always loved to collect quotes, so I saved this little gem for later use. It came in handy when the time arrived for me to choose a direction for my blog.

I have been (for the past year) starting over. My relationship with my husband was nearly broken. So much so that I had given up on saving him from his self-imposed unhappiness. He was lost to me. I had fought the good fight, and was about to accept defeat. It went against my nature. It cut away my pride. The unthinkable occurred. I surrendered. I quit trying to fix the unfixable. Just as I was washing the battlefield grime from my worn hands, something happened. Something changed.

I didn't know what it was. I still don't. But after I turned to walk away, one foot already heading in a new direction, he reached for my hand. It was a silent request. I can't tell you what prompted him. Maybe the silence after the long battle was deafening and he couldn't ignore it? Perhaps he sensed my resignation? It could be that ironic timing was at play here. It was too little. And it was too late. But a good warrior takes an "in" when it's given, especially when winning the most worthy fight of her life is at stake. I took it. In doing so, Od and I have been fighting our way back together. There's no right. There's no wrong. Only shared victory.

This past year has seen many,  many changes for us. All good. Our journey is adventurous, passionate, and so far, never-ending.

We're claiming our new happiness together, leaving the past where it belongs. There's nothing to discuss. Nothing to fix. I have my partner back. What we're doing is creating something new. Something better.




6 comments:

H said...

I like this allot

Anonymous said...

I like this a lot, too! So glad you and Od are able to create something new and something better! I also saw that quote on Tumblr and have saved it. ;-)

France said...

That is a pretty awesome post. :)

The Savage said...

I like this a lot...

Lovey Kravezit said...

What an inspiring story. I liked this a lot!

Freya said...

I'm glad you all enjoyed the post. I know that in sex blog circles when relationships lag it doesn't usually end happily - or at least faithfully. (not that I judge, because I was "this close" to being one of the unsatisfied people who stray)

I just consider myself lucky. I have no answers, no advice for anyone. I did plenty of things wrong in the process of trying to make things right.

I do think that my new sexual explorations would've happened with or without him. Either way it was time. I needed to move on from the old me to the new me, but I'm SO relieved he decided to join me.