I haven't participated in awhile and thought it'd be a good way to pass the time on a boring Sunday afternoon and also to flex my typing muscles. They are pitifully underused recently. I'll spare you the details of my other underused anatomy. *heavy sigh.....* Wow, sorry, that was more like TMI Tuesday. Anyway, this is part 1 and part 2 all in one week :
1) Who is the last person you high-fived? My son, I think, when he told me he got a 95 on a Calculus test.
2) If you were drafted into a war, would you survive. The draft yes. The war, I doubt it.
3) Do you sleep with the TV on? No. I rarely watch TV at all. I do however fall asleep listening to podcasts. They knock me right out, but waking up with earbuds strangling me is no fun.
4) Have you ever drunk milk straight out of the carton? Yep.
5) Have you ever won a spelling bee? Maybe. I can't remember, but I always lasted until the final few. These were not big bees, just classroom or grade level bees.
6) Have you ever been stung by a bee? Just once, but I remember it well. I was in 2nd grade, it was at a football game, on my inner thigh, and it hurt. Badly, for days.
7) How fast can you type? Only as quick as I think, which sometimes is slow. I took typing in school and learned the "proper" way to type with finger placement and everything, but I lost my skill and now I have to look at the keyboard, yet I still make mistakes. I made 3 typing this answer.
8) Are you afraid of the dark? Oh, no. I love the dark and feel comfortable in it, except when camping and I have to trek to the potty in the middle of the night. Why do I always have to pee in the early hours of camping, but I never do at home? Can someone please tell me that?
9) Eye color: Depends on what I'm wearing. Blue-gray, blue-green, and sometimes just blue. They look prettiest when I wear teal. So I'm told.
10) Have you ever made out at a drive-in? No. The last movie I even saw at a drive-in was Turner and Hooch with my boyfriend, his mom and her boyfriend when I was 14 or 15.
11) When was the last time you chose a bath over a shower? A week or two ago. It was bubbly and smelled like lavender.
12) Do you knock on wood? When I use the phrase I do. And that's not often.
13) Do you floss daily? No.
15) Can you hula hoop? Oh, yes. I'm a good hula hooper.
16) Are you good at keeping secrets? Yes, but it depends on the seriousness of the secret. And I'm a pretty good liar if I need to cover the truth to keep a secret. With that being said, I'm a very honest person (sometimes to a fault) and I'm quick to share things with Od - unless I'm specifically told "tell no one".
17) What do you want for Christmas? To go far far away and stay in a cabin where it does nothing outside but snow.
18) Do you know the Muffin Man? Yeah, and so do my hips. ;) That's why I'm so good at hula hooping. He lives at Panera in case you were interested.
19) Do you talk in your sleep? I've said some outrageous, non-sensical things when I get woken up by being asked a question, but I don't think I talk during sleep.
20) Who wrote the book of love? There isn't one, silly. Don't you know there is no book, pamphlet, guidelines or even rules where love is concerned? It's too tricky.
And now for part 2 :
21) Have you ever flown a kite? A few times when I was a kid and a few times with my own kids. Rarely successfully. Sometimes with tears.
22) Do you wish on your fallen lashes? I do.
23) Do you consider yourself successful? By my own standards I am successful in certain areas and a failure in others. I'm currently working on them. Failing really, really sucks.
24) When was the last time that you made an obscene phone call? I don't recall ever having made one. Now texting is an entirely different subject......
25) Have you ever asked for a pony? No. I never had a horse phase that a lot of adolescent girls have.
26) Plans for tomorrow? Making a lot of phone calls and dropping off a very large load of donations to Goodwill, and spending some time in my studio if time allows. Oh, and I'm also roasting a turkey.
27) Can you juggle? No. I've tried.
28) Missing someone now? Not really.
29) When was the last time you told someone "I love you"? I replied "love you too" in email form about an hour ago if that counts.
30) And truly meant it? I mean it every time I say it or I can't say it at all.
31) How often do you drink alcohol? 3-4 times per month or less, and my limit is 2-3 drinks. I'm a lightweight drinker.
32) How are you feeling today? bored and frustrated, but the frustration is plateauing into complacency. That's worrisome.
33) Have you every tried to write a meme? No, but I've thought about it.
34) Have you ever been fired from a job? Yes. I had to make a choice : be somewhere I wanted to be or get fired for not going in. It was a part time job and I was young and hot-headed. So I did what I wanted, knowing I'd lose my job over it. My enthusiasm for the job was winding down anyway, but I regret the "fired" stigma.
35) What are you looking forward to? Tomorrow. I love Mondays. Seriously. It's a brand new week with a clean slate. I love that.
36) Have you ever crawled through a window? Yep. I used to crawl through my old bedroom window to sunbathe on the patio roof. (and to smoke)
37) What's the most recent bad meal that you had to endure? The grilled pork loin I made 2 nights ago. It was probably in the freezer too long or just not a quality piece of meat to begin with, then I cut the pieces too thick and they were undercooked. Not a good sign when the steamed broccoli is the best part of the meal. :(
38) Can you handle the truth? Yes I can. I just wish others around me could, as well.
39) Whose to blame for what's going on? I don't care to assign blame. It indicates a refusal to take responsibility.
40) What will it take to fix it all up? Accepting the truth, holding ourselves accountable, letting go of egos, and being helpful instead of harmful.
Thank you for playing this week on Sunday Stealing! Please leave a comment or link when you have posted. Stop back and visit other player’s posts. That is really what this is all about, making new friends! Have a great week. See you next Sunday!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Friday, September 16, 2011
Fun bags
But I've become so much more aware of them. They are an entity of their own now. Before they were just there. Having served their purpose many years ago and being long forgotten by me, they were only brought out to play randomly. And I do mean ran.dom.ly. Completely ignored for a few years, in fact. So....they just shrugged their little boob shoulders and gave up.
Ah ah ah *wags pointer finger* - not so fast my sad and droopy companions. Things change, and sometimes for the better. My sex life was reignited as was my interest in other things. Kinky things. Unusual things. Relationship building things. Whatever. My boobs got to join in on my new adventures. Little did I know that the extra attention would change them. Some ways I expected for sure. They went from being unproductive to productive. That's a no brainer - and kind of the point. But our ANR has made them larger, firmer, and just plain old more fun. They look better without a bra now. They feel better, too. A little more bounce per ounce you might say. ;) And with the easy access of going braless quite often, I admit to groping myself simply because I like it.
Yeah, sometimes I'm checking for fullness or lack of, which tells me many different things like : it's close to "snuggle" time, I'm about to start my period, or I need to drink more water. But most likely when I'm caught feeling myself up it's only because these things are so much fun! Consider me enlightened. Now I know what guys see in them. If only they had their own appendages that got nice and plump and reacted in fun ways when they got played with..................
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
TMI Tuesday 9/6/11
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions are brought you by Yummy aka Heelsnstocking and Hedone. Thank you HnS for the theme.
1. What do you wear to sleep in? Nothing but a smile, and occasionally a pair of undies since I was a teenager. Except for my girls' weekends (we share rooms) and when I'm mad at Od. Then I break out the p.j.'s. For someone who sleeps nude I do have a lot of pajamas. My mom gives me a pair for my birthday or Christmas every year. I missed out on my birthday - I guess I know what I'm getting for Christmas. The thing is - she knows I don't sleep in anything!
2. Do you ever walk around your own place naked? Yes. I sneak off to the bathroom naked all the time.
3. Have you or would you ever answer the door naked? No. But our front door has a window at the top, and I've been caught making a mad dash down the hall from the bathroom by someone at the door because they got nosy when I didn't answer! It was a door-to-door person, not someone I knew.
4. What part of your body do you like to be on show? Why? Well, I'm actually a modest person, so just the regular bits, thank you, but I don't mind some cheekage or cleavage. (or sometimes just a tiiiiiiiiiny bit more!)
5. When sunbathing how much do you bare? Again - just the regular bits, but my husband would love it if I sunbathed topless and has tried to get me to do so. Our property doesn't exactly allow privacy.
6. Have you or would you bare all on a naturist (nude) beach? The thought is really intimidating, but I'm sure if I went, I might get comfortable enough to do it in stages. Maybe. If you could get me there in the first place. Well, that would be easy. Tell me I could look all I wanted and I'd be there! :)
7. Have you ever flashed your bits in public? If not would you if it turned your partner on? Not really full-out public, but I've flashed a tit inconspicuously at Od while outside e.g. facing him in the driveway, but facing away from traffic, and I may or may not have left some nipple prints on the window glass while I gave him a quickie show that our backyard neighbors could've seen if they were looking. I do it for the naughtiness factor, not necessarily because it thrills me to maybe be caught.
8. Have you ever given a striptease or has anyone given you one? Did you enjoy it? Yes, I've given one or two and enjoyed it immensely because I know I was good at it. I've never received one though. The appeal of a male strip club just isn't there for me because I imagine the men are all hairless and oiled up - and that's not my type at all.
9. Ever gone skinny dipping? Alone or with others? I love skinny dipping. I love gliding through the water with nothing on. One time in high school stands out. My friend Carrie had a squeaky clean Aloha themed party but when most people went home there were a few neighborhood guys that hung around with a hand full of us girls and we pool crashed at her out-of-town neighbor's place. We all swam with our suits on, but as soon as the guys had to leave we stripped them off and went skinny dipping. We found out afterwards they didn't actually leave, but parked down the street, walked back and watched us!
NAKED
2. Do you ever walk around your own place naked? Yes. I sneak off to the bathroom naked all the time.
3. Have you or would you ever answer the door naked? No. But our front door has a window at the top, and I've been caught making a mad dash down the hall from the bathroom by someone at the door because they got nosy when I didn't answer! It was a door-to-door person, not someone I knew.
4. What part of your body do you like to be on show? Why? Well, I'm actually a modest person, so just the regular bits, thank you, but I don't mind some cheekage or cleavage. (or sometimes just a tiiiiiiiiiny bit more!)
5. When sunbathing how much do you bare? Again - just the regular bits, but my husband would love it if I sunbathed topless and has tried to get me to do so. Our property doesn't exactly allow privacy.
6. Have you or would you bare all on a naturist (nude) beach? The thought is really intimidating, but I'm sure if I went, I might get comfortable enough to do it in stages. Maybe. If you could get me there in the first place. Well, that would be easy. Tell me I could look all I wanted and I'd be there! :)
7. Have you ever flashed your bits in public? If not would you if it turned your partner on? Not really full-out public, but I've flashed a tit inconspicuously at Od while outside e.g. facing him in the driveway, but facing away from traffic, and I may or may not have left some nipple prints on the window glass while I gave him a quickie show that our backyard neighbors could've seen if they were looking. I do it for the naughtiness factor, not necessarily because it thrills me to maybe be caught.
8. Have you ever given a striptease or has anyone given you one? Did you enjoy it? Yes, I've given one or two and enjoyed it immensely because I know I was good at it. I've never received one though. The appeal of a male strip club just isn't there for me because I imagine the men are all hairless and oiled up - and that's not my type at all.
9. Ever gone skinny dipping? Alone or with others? I love skinny dipping. I love gliding through the water with nothing on. One time in high school stands out. My friend Carrie had a squeaky clean Aloha themed party but when most people went home there were a few neighborhood guys that hung around with a hand full of us girls and we pool crashed at her out-of-town neighbor's place. We all swam with our suits on, but as soon as the guys had to leave we stripped them off and went skinny dipping. We found out afterwards they didn't actually leave, but parked down the street, walked back and watched us!
I just remembered that I also tried on multiple occasions to get Od to skinny dip with me at his dad's place when we had to take care of mail/animals/pool when he was on vacation. I don't think he would, but I remember having fantasies about fucking on the diving board. I know for certain that that never happened. :(
10. Do you like to look at naked people or do you want show off your nakedness? Do I like to look at naked people? *snort* Yes, but for different reasons. I like to look no matter what because human differences just naturally interest me, and I'm a people watcher at heart, with or without clothes. Also I love to look because a beautiful body is undeniably attractive. There's something beautiful about everyone. I used to be embarrassed about looking, but now I own up to it. I've discovered just how much I love and am attracted to the male body. I'm more voyeuristic than exhibitionistic.
Bonus: Sexually speaking, what’s the furthest you would go with a partner in public? Have you had sex in public? I think I've gone as far as I'm gonna go in public. I've not had sex in public, and wouldn't want to - if we're talking about having a risk of being caught. I don't want to get caught. I would have sex in public locations if our privacy were guaranteed. Certain outdoor areas are calling to me! ;)
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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
10. Do you like to look at naked people or do you want show off your nakedness? Do I like to look at naked people? *snort* Yes, but for different reasons. I like to look no matter what because human differences just naturally interest me, and I'm a people watcher at heart, with or without clothes. Also I love to look because a beautiful body is undeniably attractive. There's something beautiful about everyone. I used to be embarrassed about looking, but now I own up to it. I've discovered just how much I love and am attracted to the male body. I'm more voyeuristic than exhibitionistic.
Bonus: Sexually speaking, what’s the furthest you would go with a partner in public? Have you had sex in public? I think I've gone as far as I'm gonna go in public. I've not had sex in public, and wouldn't want to - if we're talking about having a risk of being caught. I don't want to get caught. I would have sex in public locations if our privacy were guaranteed. Certain outdoor areas are calling to me! ;)
————-
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
Happy TMI Tuesday!
Friday, September 2, 2011
Feeling playful
It began with a request.
"Send me an email."
He complied late in the day, but with something that delightfully bordered on dirty talk.
Email 1 : "What should I say?"
Email 2 : "Will you suck my cock if I do?"
Email 3 : "Sorry for the late reply."
Email 4 : "Ok. Would you tug on my balls and nibble my head a little please?"
I was reading my email while he was gone to return movies to the store. I was inspired by his wishlist and in the mood to play along. Admittedly, the naughtiness of his emails and the anticipation of his return amped up my arousal.
I waited in the dark bedroom, under the covers, simmering, planning.
I felt the need for control sliding up on me. A rather elusive feeling lately, but I welcomed it back. Aggressive replaced passive in a single moment. It's a flash fire when taking control feeds the need for more of it, which leads to taking more. It's hard to know where to stop sometimes.
He might be a dead man if he didn't hurry home.
Finally I hear the unmistakable jingle of his keys, and soft thuds in the hallway that bring him closer to me. He flips the light on, surprised to see me in bed already, and chats away about his trip to the store. I say "mm hmmm" in the appropriate places. He also got dog food to which I reply "mm hmmm" as my eyes track him around the room. He offers up a taste of a new bottled drink he picked up. "Mm hmm" again as I reach my hand out for his offering. He watches me drink, glancing at the way the sheets expose what I'm not wearing. I watch him watch me. I think the gears are clicking into place. He knows.
"I'm gonna put this stuff away and I'll be right back, ok?"
"Mm hmmm" I agree, keeping my smirk to myself, but once he's gone it breaks free.
Back in the room, he undresses to join me, but seeing him naked with the removal of only t-shirt and jeans reminds me that it's been way too long since he's donned something special for me.
I halt him at the edge of the bed. "Put some boxers on." For me, this is a rare treat that I must ask for. It's a reverse order of eroticism. The norm is commando. And since I'm feeling cat-and-mouse tonight, I want my mouse accessorized. The better to play with.
Boxers on, lights out, he slips under the covers. He lies there, waiting, breathing expectantly. I wait, feeling my own heart rate accelerate, and chew on my lower lip to keep myself quiet. Patience is hard for this cat, but his anticipation needs to build closer to my own. I wait, then wait some more. His breaths tell me all I need to know. Quick, steady, definitely not relaxed.
I pounce.
He actually jumps when I assault him, so unprepared for my form of attack. He's expecting cock. I go for nipples. His arms were crossed above his head, all ready to relax into the attention he thinks he's going to get. I see a weakness. I love weaknesses. And his reaction only spurs me on. Predators love it when prey struggles. It only intensifies the hunt. I told him as much, in between licks, nibbles, sucks and bites. My hands press his elbows back into the pillow as I bend my neck over him and really get into my work. His body shudders from the effort of holding still and the intensity of the sensation. It seems I caught him on a ticklish day. I pause long enough to allow him to breathe.
"I can't..." deep inhale "it's too..." pant, pant "Oh, god...."
"Describe it to me." With a slow swirling tongue I return to my task.
More shuddering. And now squirming.
"It...I....ahhhh....Ifeelitbehindmyknees!"
Curious. His body is a treasure of knowledge and I'm determined to uncover everything. I briefly wonder if the other nipple has the same effect, but quickly dismiss the thought. I'm having too much fun with this one.
On and on it goes. I vacillate between tickling pleasure and biting pleasure at no particular rhythm, with some snarls and growling and chest hair tugging thrown in when his arms disobey. He's warned with a not-so-pleasurable nip.
"Hold. Still."
I run a testing palm across his boxers, scouting for my next plan of attack. He's ready.
"Keep your arms above your head."
With my hands and face running paths back and forth across his chest, his ribs, and finally his belly, I settle in on my knees between his spread legs. But I'm not done with my plaything just yet.
He endures more licking, more sucking, more biting on his sensitive sides. I nip wherever I can get a good grip with my teeth. I clamp my mouth down and suck in earnest wherever there's a smooth patch of skin. And I lick......well.......I lick everywhere - while running my hands up the legs of his boxers and teasing his inner thighs, while gripping his hips as they impatiently squirm, and while I ever-so-slowly work the waistband down one hip, then the other. Then lower. And lower. I leave his legs trapped in them mid thigh momentarily as I take advantage of new areas to lick, suck, and bite. The joint of his legs. Fleshy, meaty thigh. Up to the hip again, across the warm and fuzzy belly - not passing up the navel - to the other side, only to repeat the circuit. I sneak in a wiggly lick on the frenulum and revel in the sharp intake of his breath. Leaning up I spend a few minutes dragging my breasts around his crotch, capturing his erection while skin rubs against skin. I work my way down to the scrotum but never staying in one place long enough for him to release tension. I like him on edge. I prefer it.
And that's where I keep him. Even after I do eventually suck his cock. And tug mercilessly on his balls. And nibble on the head a little bit. And just for fun I throw in some handjob. With more tugging and more sucking. Repeatedly, until he's reached the edge countless times.
And just to test him, I crawl up his body and take him in, grinding our hips together slowly and closely, leaning back a little while we both enjoy the ride. After a few minutes I pull off him and recline back onto the bed. Words not needed, my prey knows that he's been released.
And now it's his turn to pounce.
"Send me an email."
He complied late in the day, but with something that delightfully bordered on dirty talk.
Email 1 : "What should I say?"
Email 2 : "Will you suck my cock if I do?"
Email 3 : "Sorry for the late reply."
Email 4 : "Ok. Would you tug on my balls and nibble my head a little please?"
I was reading my email while he was gone to return movies to the store. I was inspired by his wishlist and in the mood to play along. Admittedly, the naughtiness of his emails and the anticipation of his return amped up my arousal.
I waited in the dark bedroom, under the covers, simmering, planning.
I felt the need for control sliding up on me. A rather elusive feeling lately, but I welcomed it back. Aggressive replaced passive in a single moment. It's a flash fire when taking control feeds the need for more of it, which leads to taking more. It's hard to know where to stop sometimes.
He might be a dead man if he didn't hurry home.
Finally I hear the unmistakable jingle of his keys, and soft thuds in the hallway that bring him closer to me. He flips the light on, surprised to see me in bed already, and chats away about his trip to the store. I say "mm hmmm" in the appropriate places. He also got dog food to which I reply "mm hmmm" as my eyes track him around the room. He offers up a taste of a new bottled drink he picked up. "Mm hmm" again as I reach my hand out for his offering. He watches me drink, glancing at the way the sheets expose what I'm not wearing. I watch him watch me. I think the gears are clicking into place. He knows.
"I'm gonna put this stuff away and I'll be right back, ok?"
"Mm hmmm" I agree, keeping my smirk to myself, but once he's gone it breaks free.
Back in the room, he undresses to join me, but seeing him naked with the removal of only t-shirt and jeans reminds me that it's been way too long since he's donned something special for me.
I halt him at the edge of the bed. "Put some boxers on." For me, this is a rare treat that I must ask for. It's a reverse order of eroticism. The norm is commando. And since I'm feeling cat-and-mouse tonight, I want my mouse accessorized. The better to play with.
Boxers on, lights out, he slips under the covers. He lies there, waiting, breathing expectantly. I wait, feeling my own heart rate accelerate, and chew on my lower lip to keep myself quiet. Patience is hard for this cat, but his anticipation needs to build closer to my own. I wait, then wait some more. His breaths tell me all I need to know. Quick, steady, definitely not relaxed.
I pounce.
He actually jumps when I assault him, so unprepared for my form of attack. He's expecting cock. I go for nipples. His arms were crossed above his head, all ready to relax into the attention he thinks he's going to get. I see a weakness. I love weaknesses. And his reaction only spurs me on. Predators love it when prey struggles. It only intensifies the hunt. I told him as much, in between licks, nibbles, sucks and bites. My hands press his elbows back into the pillow as I bend my neck over him and really get into my work. His body shudders from the effort of holding still and the intensity of the sensation. It seems I caught him on a ticklish day. I pause long enough to allow him to breathe.
"I can't..." deep inhale "it's too..." pant, pant "Oh, god...."
"Describe it to me." With a slow swirling tongue I return to my task.
More shuddering. And now squirming.
"It...I....ahhhh....Ifeelitbehindmyknees!"
Curious. His body is a treasure of knowledge and I'm determined to uncover everything. I briefly wonder if the other nipple has the same effect, but quickly dismiss the thought. I'm having too much fun with this one.
On and on it goes. I vacillate between tickling pleasure and biting pleasure at no particular rhythm, with some snarls and growling and chest hair tugging thrown in when his arms disobey. He's warned with a not-so-pleasurable nip.
"Hold. Still."
I run a testing palm across his boxers, scouting for my next plan of attack. He's ready.
"Keep your arms above your head."
With my hands and face running paths back and forth across his chest, his ribs, and finally his belly, I settle in on my knees between his spread legs. But I'm not done with my plaything just yet.
He endures more licking, more sucking, more biting on his sensitive sides. I nip wherever I can get a good grip with my teeth. I clamp my mouth down and suck in earnest wherever there's a smooth patch of skin. And I lick......well.......I lick everywhere - while running my hands up the legs of his boxers and teasing his inner thighs, while gripping his hips as they impatiently squirm, and while I ever-so-slowly work the waistband down one hip, then the other. Then lower. And lower. I leave his legs trapped in them mid thigh momentarily as I take advantage of new areas to lick, suck, and bite. The joint of his legs. Fleshy, meaty thigh. Up to the hip again, across the warm and fuzzy belly - not passing up the navel - to the other side, only to repeat the circuit. I sneak in a wiggly lick on the frenulum and revel in the sharp intake of his breath. Leaning up I spend a few minutes dragging my breasts around his crotch, capturing his erection while skin rubs against skin. I work my way down to the scrotum but never staying in one place long enough for him to release tension. I like him on edge. I prefer it.
And that's where I keep him. Even after I do eventually suck his cock. And tug mercilessly on his balls. And nibble on the head a little bit. And just for fun I throw in some handjob. With more tugging and more sucking. Repeatedly, until he's reached the edge countless times.
And just to test him, I crawl up his body and take him in, grinding our hips together slowly and closely, leaning back a little while we both enjoy the ride. After a few minutes I pull off him and recline back onto the bed. Words not needed, my prey knows that he's been released.
And now it's his turn to pounce.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Can we talk about Jesus?
Of the Touchdown or Big Butter variety? Some of you in the states know just what I mean. To the others: you might want to stick around anyway for some ironic humor.
I was listening to the Savage Love podcast this morning when Dan brought up the rebuilding of the infamous statue that burned down 14 months ago. You can Google it. I even think there's a video on YouTube. Personally I Bing'd it and it was the first selection after I typed in "touchdown" - so as crazy as this thing is, I guess it's a big deal. People make pilgrimages to have their picture taken near the statue. And not just Ohio State University fans either. Religious fanatics seem to love it too, and thousands upon thousands were saddened by it's divine demise. The tacky and (I'm sure in some way) sacrilegious styrofoam statue was struck by lightning and swiftly burned down to the.....well, I guess...... the water. He was rising from a pond, you see. That always bothered me. Why was the scale so large if they were only going to show half? Did the budget get blown? Was the funding for his lower half misplaced? Is there some religious reference about him rising out of the water that I'm missing? I though that was Neptune from mythology, not Jesus from the Bible. I'm confused, because I'll admit - I'm not overly familiar with stories and scriptures. I'd really like to know.
I happen to remember that stormy night very well. It was late, the winds were picking up and the windows were open. Nature was providing Od and I with excellent sound cover in the form of thunder as we prepared to rendezvous in the living room. I had the music set, blankets on the floor, and was hanging my head out the window to breathe in the scent and energy of the storm. Just as Od came up behind me, pressing his warm body to mine, there was a massive lightning strike that occurred in the distance. I jumped a little with surprise and got goosebumps from the excitement and the open window. My husband took notice of my chill and then we forgot all about the storm raging outside as we created our own tempest - friction warming me right back up eventually to the point of sweaty exhaustion. If I remember correctly, a dildo and some rope were involved. ;) We didn't think a thing of the lightning until the charred remains of Jesus made headlines the next morning. Apparently he ended the night with a bang, too.
Anyway, Dan Savage was prattling on about the ridiculous thing and the twitter surrounding the subject of it's rebuilding. And then he dropped an interesting fact that had never occurred to me. God hates bad art made in his son's image worse than he hates porn. It's a fact. You know why? Because right across I-75 sits a very large and popular adult store that survived the attack. My adult store. Where porn is sold. Where kinky, deviant, sexual paraphernalia is sold. And you might think that if anyone would be struck down by God's hand it would be the source of evil for us fornicating sinners. But it's not. It's the crazy bible thumpers who build ugly statues and put neon doves on the ceiling of the sanctuary. (It's a fact. I'm not making this shit up - I've attended a wedding there.)
The irony in this situation comes a bit late to me, but the thrill and relief from this realization is huge. It hits close to home - much like the fateful lightning. God can be found everywhere. But a good sex toy store? Those are hard to come by, people. I'm lucky to have one so close to me. And to that I say *lifts hands in the proper touchdown pose* Praise Jesus.
Some interesting facts about the statue, just for fun :
The statue was 62 feet tall and weighed 8 tons.
Construction began in June 2004.
Designed by Brad Coriell Nashville artist and Dayton native.
Built by sculptor James Lynch of Florida.
Funded by Lawrence and Darlene Bishop, Solid Rock Church pastors.
The project cost $250,000.
The steel frame was built in Lebanon. The body, of Styrofoam and fiberglass, was fabricated at Lynch’s studio in Florida.
The 13-foot long parts were transported by trucks to Monroe. Lynch’s studio is 13 feet tall.
Immortalized by comedian Heywood Banks in his novelty song, “Big Butter Jesus.”
 |
| Big Butter Touchdown Jesus before and after the lightning strike |
I was listening to the Savage Love podcast this morning when Dan brought up the rebuilding of the infamous statue that burned down 14 months ago. You can Google it. I even think there's a video on YouTube. Personally I Bing'd it and it was the first selection after I typed in "touchdown" - so as crazy as this thing is, I guess it's a big deal. People make pilgrimages to have their picture taken near the statue. And not just Ohio State University fans either. Religious fanatics seem to love it too, and thousands upon thousands were saddened by it's divine demise. The tacky and (I'm sure in some way) sacrilegious styrofoam statue was struck by lightning and swiftly burned down to the.....well, I guess...... the water. He was rising from a pond, you see. That always bothered me. Why was the scale so large if they were only going to show half? Did the budget get blown? Was the funding for his lower half misplaced? Is there some religious reference about him rising out of the water that I'm missing? I though that was Neptune from mythology, not Jesus from the Bible. I'm confused, because I'll admit - I'm not overly familiar with stories and scriptures. I'd really like to know.
I happen to remember that stormy night very well. It was late, the winds were picking up and the windows were open. Nature was providing Od and I with excellent sound cover in the form of thunder as we prepared to rendezvous in the living room. I had the music set, blankets on the floor, and was hanging my head out the window to breathe in the scent and energy of the storm. Just as Od came up behind me, pressing his warm body to mine, there was a massive lightning strike that occurred in the distance. I jumped a little with surprise and got goosebumps from the excitement and the open window. My husband took notice of my chill and then we forgot all about the storm raging outside as we created our own tempest - friction warming me right back up eventually to the point of sweaty exhaustion. If I remember correctly, a dildo and some rope were involved. ;) We didn't think a thing of the lightning until the charred remains of Jesus made headlines the next morning. Apparently he ended the night with a bang, too.
Anyway, Dan Savage was prattling on about the ridiculous thing and the twitter surrounding the subject of it's rebuilding. And then he dropped an interesting fact that had never occurred to me. God hates bad art made in his son's image worse than he hates porn. It's a fact. You know why? Because right across I-75 sits a very large and popular adult store that survived the attack. My adult store. Where porn is sold. Where kinky, deviant, sexual paraphernalia is sold. And you might think that if anyone would be struck down by God's hand it would be the source of evil for us fornicating sinners. But it's not. It's the crazy bible thumpers who build ugly statues and put neon doves on the ceiling of the sanctuary. (It's a fact. I'm not making this shit up - I've attended a wedding there.)
The irony in this situation comes a bit late to me, but the thrill and relief from this realization is huge. It hits close to home - much like the fateful lightning. God can be found everywhere. But a good sex toy store? Those are hard to come by, people. I'm lucky to have one so close to me. And to that I say *lifts hands in the proper touchdown pose* Praise Jesus.
Some interesting facts about the statue, just for fun :
The statue was 62 feet tall and weighed 8 tons.
Construction began in June 2004.
Designed by Brad Coriell Nashville artist and Dayton native.
Built by sculptor James Lynch of Florida.
Funded by Lawrence and Darlene Bishop, Solid Rock Church pastors.
The project cost $250,000.
The steel frame was built in Lebanon. The body, of Styrofoam and fiberglass, was fabricated at Lynch’s studio in Florida.
The 13-foot long parts were transported by trucks to Monroe. Lynch’s studio is 13 feet tall.
Immortalized by comedian Heywood Banks in his novelty song, “Big Butter Jesus.”
Friday, August 26, 2011
It was worth it
Conversation that occurred in my bedroom last week :
"So, do you like it?"
"Mmmmmm mmm"
"Is that a yes?"
Big sigh followed by "Mmm hmmmmmmmmm" and a lazy,slow spreading, uncontrollable, ear to ear grin that looked like this :
I lay there, quite unable to move, and quite uncaring about my inability - much like the sly, contented, there-but-not-really-there Cheshire Cat. I was nothing more than a puddle of bliss with a grin assaulting one set of cheeks while a massive wet spot assaulted the other set. When the words stopped swirling in my brain and formed a sentence I finally managed "I don't know, or even care how much you spent on that thing.........but it was worth it!"
And because I desperately needed to rehydrate and also because the wet spot was cooling, I got up. To give my husband a breathy kiss and thank him one more time for my birthday present. And to strip the bed and change the sheets. For the third day in a row.
So yeah. I had a happy birthday and I really really like the njoy pure wand. Od is very pleased with himself on many levels. Not only did he surprise me with something I wanted but hadn't asked for, but now he has proof of my abilities.
And Donna, you were so right about those waterproof mattress pads! ;)
Thank you to everyone who sent me birthday greetings and happy wishes. Know that I smiled for days. And that I still do when I read them or listen to them. I love that you all played along in my celebrational stunt of narcissism. You're safe until next year! LOL :D
Big hugs and kisses all around!
"So, do you like it?"
"Mmmmmm mmm"
"Is that a yes?"
Big sigh followed by "Mmm hmmmmmmmmm" and a lazy,slow spreading, uncontrollable, ear to ear grin that looked like this :
And because I desperately needed to rehydrate and also because the wet spot was cooling, I got up. To give my husband a breathy kiss and thank him one more time for my birthday present. And to strip the bed and change the sheets. For the third day in a row.
So yeah. I had a happy birthday and I really really like the njoy pure wand. Od is very pleased with himself on many levels. Not only did he surprise me with something I wanted but hadn't asked for, but now he has proof of my abilities.
And Donna, you were so right about those waterproof mattress pads! ;)
Thank you to everyone who sent me birthday greetings and happy wishes. Know that I smiled for days. And that I still do when I read them or listen to them. I love that you all played along in my celebrational stunt of narcissism. You're safe until next year! LOL :D
Big hugs and kisses all around!
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Happy Happy Happy!!!
My two weeks is up and today is the big day. Officially I'm still 36 until 9:34 p.m. I've had my birthday serenade from my parents and I've opened one of my gifts from Od already. It had to be done behind closed doors. Wanna know what my sweetie gave me? He has such good taste.
I got this beauty :
It's an njoy pure wand. Isn't it pretty? And oh, my goodness it's heavy. And shiny. And feels very nice in my hands. I'm looking forward to playing with it very much. It's good for G spots and P spots, so I just might be sharing it. ;)
I've been told there's more to open this evening and then it's out to dinner for something yummy and perhaps an adult beverage. Or two. Or three.
In continuation of treating myself this week I have :
And finally, for those of you who have already been brave and kind enough to share yourselves with me - thank you very much!!!!!! You're responsible for the big grin I've been wearing for a couple days. I've learned not to check my email while in public. Spontaneous laughter makes me look like a crazy person! LOL
And for the rest of you.........what are you waiting for? It's my birthday don't ya know?!!?
I got this beauty :
I've been told there's more to open this evening and then it's out to dinner for something yummy and perhaps an adult beverage. Or two. Or three.
In continuation of treating myself this week I have :
- gone to see a movie and had lunch with my mom. We saw The Help. It was a seriously good movie. I mean really good. Do yourself a favor and go see it. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll be outraged and you'll cheer. And you'll never look at chocolate pie the same again! ;)
- purchased a few new books to read. And only one of them is full of sexual filth. Oh wait - it's not filth - it's erotica. *snort*
- had another nap. The last one was so good I needed a repeat. Only there's no nudie pics this week. :)
- scheduled myself a proper hot oil manicure and spa pedicure (received today as a matter of fact) and a cut and color and a hot stone therapy massage. I'm really excited about the massage - always wanted to try the hot stones. But between you and me I'm most excited about Mitchell. He'll be my masseuse tomorrow. There's something about the idea of a new man's hands all over me........(because I'm naughty like that)
- enjoyed an afternoon of shopping. There wasn't anything I really needed, but somehow I walked away with a new piece of pretty cookware.
- replaced my fading bouquet of mixed flowers with a fresh bunch of mixed roses. I might have to make this a weekly thing. Flowers on the table make me unbelievably happy each time I walk by.
And finally, for those of you who have already been brave and kind enough to share yourselves with me - thank you very much!!!!!! You're responsible for the big grin I've been wearing for a couple days. I've learned not to check my email while in public. Spontaneous laughter makes me look like a crazy person! LOL
And for the rest of you.........what are you waiting for? It's my birthday don't ya know?!!?
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